I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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