I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
