I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
