It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
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