break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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