I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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