do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I have demons in me.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize