did you get engaged???
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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