I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
