i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
