we made out on top of his cat.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize