it was like eating out sand paper
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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