I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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