i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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