pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
