Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
im holly from the hills drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize