dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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