No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
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