I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize