I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize