I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize