Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
God I need to hump something, right now.
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