he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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