I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
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