they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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