Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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