It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
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I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
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There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
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