i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize