Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
A bitchslap is in order.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
There's even glitter on my cock...
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