thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
