Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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