: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
