Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(503): View more from Oregon

i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking

(1-503): View more from Oregon

I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning

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(503): i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking (1-503): I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning http://tfl.nu/mjdo

Replies (14) Good night (4901) Bad night (865)
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(727): View more from Florida

I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.

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(727): I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now. http://tfl.nu/6a5q

Replies (17) Good night (1029) Bad night (4178)
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(916): View more from California

Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.

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(916): Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much. http://tfl.nu/45kg

Replies (3) Good night (1023) Bad night (2161)
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(310): View more from California

I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.

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(310): I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in. http://tfl.nu/n54h

Replies (6) Good night (6043) Bad night (987)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.

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(314): Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen. http://tfl.nu/614c

Replies (10) Good night (4142) Bad night (882)
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(816): View more from Missouri

I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.

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(816): I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions. http://tfl.nu/d3ti

Replies (10) Good night (2471) Bad night (801)
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(954): View more from Florida

These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.

(1-954): View more from Florida

Marco

(954): View more from Florida

Polo

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(954): These days, you and me are swimming in dicks. (1-954): Marco (954): Polo http://tfl.nu/zk92

Replies (7) Good night (2721) Bad night (703)
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(850): View more from Florida

After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.

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(850): After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up. http://tfl.nu/jmm0

Replies (0) Good night (747) Bad night (413)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.

(1-405): View more from Oklahoma

Does he think you're psycho?

(405): View more from Oklahoma

Officially...... yes.

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(405): I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new. (1-405): Does he think you're psycho? (405): Officially...... yes. http://tfl.nu/uyur

Replies (8) Good night (1617) Bad night (556)
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(440): View more from Ohio

Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"

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(440): Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!" http://tfl.nu/2j1e

Replies (11) Good night (1933) Bad night (716)
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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.

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(913): I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against. http://tfl.nu/anj9

Replies (0) Good night (664) Bad night (382)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...

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(828): just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever... http://tfl.nu/nfkk

Replies (5) Good night (907) Bad night (686)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind

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(651): I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind http://tfl.nu/rbfo

Replies (2) Good night (564) Bad night (415)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.

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(336): I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand. http://tfl.nu/v7rz

Replies (4) Good night (966) Bad night (410)
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(734): View more from Michigan

I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing

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(734): I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing http://tfl.nu/hsq9

Replies (1) Good night (573) Bad night (408)

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