So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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