Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
