I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
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