all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
