whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
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CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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