Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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