How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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