if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
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