do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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