so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
jump out the window naked night went bad
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
