Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Randomize
