My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
vagina is talking i cant
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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