Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
