2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Randomize
