I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
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