I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
