He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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